Valley Breeze

The Valley Breeze Woonsocket North Smithfield 07-23-2020

The Valley Breeze Newspapers serving the Northern Rhode Island towns of Cumberland, Lincoln, Woonsocket, Smithfield, North Smithfield, Pawtucket, North Providence, Scituate, Foster, and Glocester

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Page 26 of 39

VALLEY BREEZE LIVING EDITION | JULY 23-29, 2020 AT HOME / CELEBRATIONS 27 Toddler head banging – this too will pass Q: When my 2-year-old gets angry, he sometimes gets down and bangs his head on the floor. This happens two or three times a week, generally speaking. He's not bruised himself, yet, but I don't know how long that's going to last. To make mat- ters worse, I've made the mistake of reading about various psychological disorders and have started to obsess about the autism spectrum thing. Other than the head banging, he's a happy, verbal, and very imaginative child, able to play by himself in his room for several hours at a stretch. I'm blessed and worried at the same time. Can you give me some reas- suring words? A: That's not an unreasonable request. Try these: Far as I can tell, you have nothing to worry about. Hold that thought. I'll come back to it in a moment or three. It's a fascinating fact, human beings are the only species that need – or have recently come to thinking they need – specially trained, highly evolved, super-sages like myself to help them navigate the fundamen- tally simple, non-intellectual pro- cess of raising a child to competent adulthood. Since 1970, more than 100,000 books on how to raise chil- dren have hit the market. Around 20 were written by yours truly (with more to come). God help me. The irony in all of this is the more the experts have published, the more difficult childrearing has become. A good part of the prob- lem has to do with the inherently progressive nature of the publishing business. To be published, an author must come up with a new idea, a novel approach, something "fresh." It follows that the more parenting books, articles, columns, and so on a parent reads, the more the parent is bombarded with new ideas and approaches, and the more confused and anxious the parent becomes. Too much information! To continue ... and the more confused and anxious the parent becomes, the more the parent reads in a never-ending and vain search for the new idea that will end all new ideas. This craziness is why I have a job. Like I said. Unlike most people of my ilk, however, I am a proponent of the ancient kisaii school of wisdom parenting, kisaii standing for keep- it-simple, as-it-is. In the raising of a child, the simplest approach (uncon- ditional love and an equal measure of unequivocal leadership) and the simplest explanations rule. You, dear mother, are thinking too much. You are indeed blessed! He entertains himself for hours? That's as clear a sign of good development as any. But, keep in mind, nearly all tod- dlers are haunted with episodes of kick-out-the-jams insanity. I flunked Diagnosing Across the Miles 101 in grad school, but I can tell you that 2-year-olds – being the nut cases they can become in a heartbeat – are prone to doing things like banging their heads on the floor when they don't get their way. I might be concerned if he was oblivious to hurting himself, but the absence of bruising and the fact that he's still acting normatively in every other respect (he's not acting like a drunk, e.g.) suggests strongly that he knows when to stop. To bring this chapter in his life to a close, draw a chalk circle on the floor in a side room. Tell him his doctor says he can bang his head all he wants, but only inside the circle. If he starts banging, take him to the circle (drag gently), say, "Bang your head here, my love," and walk away. This too will pass. I give it two weeks, tops. See how simple that was? Family psychologist John Rosemond:, Traditional Parenting JOHN ROSEMOND Ayotte - Middleton CUMBERLAND – Ariel C. Ayotte, of Cumberland, and Matthew D. Middleton, of North Smithfield, announce their engagement. She is the daughter of Judith Ayotte, of Cumberland, and Michael Ayotte, of Blackstone. He is the son of Daniel and Judy Middleton, of North Smithfield. The future bride is a 2014 gradu- ate of Cumberland High School, and attends Rhode Island College, study- ing early childhood development. She is the lead singer in the band Perfect Harmony, and editor of "A.S.K. Ministries." The future groom received an associate degree in general educa- tion from Community College of Rhode Island, and a bachelor's degree in social work from Rhode Island College. He is employed by Riverside Community Care. He is also the lead guitar player and singer in the band Saved by Skarlet. The couple are planning to wed on June 6, 2021. 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With a cup of soup or a small salad. $16.50 BAKED SEA SCALLOPS - Giant North Atlantic sea scallops baked with a lemon butter crumb topping, with pasta or fries & soup or salad. $17.95 BAKED SEAFOOD PLATTER - A medley of fresh cod, sea scallops and shrimp, baked in our lemon butter crumb topping, with pasta or fries & soup or salad. $20.95 LOBSTER, SHRIMP & SCALLOPS IN A PINK ALFREDO SAUCE - Lobster, shrimp and scallops in a pink Alfredo sauce served over fresh fettuccine, with soup or salad. $21.95 BUFFALO CHICKEN BLUE CHEESE GOURMET PIZZA - Tangy buffalo sauce, topped with grilled Buffalo chicken, red onion, mozzarella cheese and fresh blue cheese chunks on our gourmet pizza dough. $13.95 CHICKEN FINGERS - Served with dipping sauce $9.25 EAST PROVIDENCE LOCATION ONLY! ®

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