Valley Breeze

The North Providence Breeze 03-25-2020

The Valley Breeze Newspapers serving the Northern Rhode Island towns of Cumberland, Lincoln, Woonsocket, Smithfield, North Smithfield, Pawtucket, North Providence, Scituate, Foster, and Glocester

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14 ENTERTAINMENT / AT HOME MARCH 25-31, 2020 | VALLEY BREEZE & OBSERVER LIVING EDITION anxiety to raging misbehavior. Intuitively, children know they can't deal with the world, in all of its complexity and unpredict- ability, on their own. They need people who are big in every sense of the term to deal with it on their behalf. When those people fail to act up to the job of being big, 24/7, it throws chil- dren into a tizzy. The tizzies provide mental health professionals with a living, fodder for the justification of largely meaningless testing, diagnoses that have no scientific basis, and medications that don't reliably outperform placebos. Unfortunately, the tiz- zies are a large part of yours truly's raison d'etre. America is facing a crisis at the moment. No one knows for sure where this is headed, how long it will last, or how much it's going to change for the long term our collective way of life. For parents, the crisis requires keeping calm and carrying on. Calming a child's potential emotional reactions is only possible if one's own emotions are under complete control. It would be unfair to suggest that having emotions in a crisis is a sign of parental weakness. Go ahead, have emotions. Just keep them under opaque wraps when kids are around. "When and how should I tell my children about the corona- virus?" is the question I am most frequently and urgently asked these days. I answer, "When they ask questions." An unsolicited homily is likely to provoke rather than subdue anxiety. When questions are asked, keep it short and sweet, as in, "Mom and I have this under control. We have plenty of food and we're staying indoors or in our own backyard as much as possible to reduce the chance of getting sick, but even if one of us gets sick, it's probably going to be nothing more than a runny nose, sneezing, and maybe a slight fever, like a bad cold. We're all healthy people. In any case, we're going to take care of you. You're our first priority. Any other questions?" At some point, one may need to say, "That's enough questions. What are your plans for the day?" Knowing when to end a conversation of this sort is being a big person, the adult in the room. Family psychologist John Rosemond:, PARENTING From Page 11 Amazon's 'Honey Boy' loosely based on life of Shia LaBeouf HHH1/2 Last week, I focused on the Netflix film "Spenser Confidential" and this week I am turning my eye toward the Amazon-produced "Honey Boy." I'd heard good things about this film a couple of months ago during the Toronto Film Festival. It was writ- ten by actor Shia LaBeouf and was loosely based on his own experienc- es growing up a child actor. The film chronicles two separate time frames of one man's life. It careens back and forth between the past, 1995, and then 2005 when the lead, Otis, was an aspiring child actor, and then as an older, troubled one. Portraying the younger Otis is Noah Jupe, who was most recently in "Ford vs Ferrari." Lucas Hedges ("Manchester by the Sea") plays the twenty-something Otis. The film opens and establishes that the older Otis (Hedges) is a bit of a mess and is involved in a drunk- driving incident that ultimately sends him to a rehab facility rather than a jail cell. It is here that the story shifts its tale and begins recounting his upbringing with his father and his early days in a comedy sitcom on a Disney-like TV show. Otis' father James is played by Shia LaBeouf and he is a recovering alcoholic, four years into sobriety. James is an odd guy and while his son pursues act- ing, dad is doing his best to pick up women on the set. I was very impressed with the younger actor Jupe as he definitely had to carry the load more often in regards to playing the heavier, emotional parts. His acting opposite LaBeouf was heartfelt and saddening. The dad, James, just cannot get out of his own way and he is basically being paid by his son and he is defi- nitely at odds with this. Otis' mom is never seen but is referenced and for whatever reason, it does appear that James has full custody. The relation- ship between the two is tenuous and strained at times, and the fact that they live in a seedy motel doesn't always help the situation. Otis ends up striking up a relation- ship with a young call girl (FKA Twigs) who befriends him and com- forts him when his father is so distant and unavailable. This is a brutally honest and obviously very personal film from LaBeouf. Allegedly, the rift between LaBeouf and his real father went on for years. I can imagine it must have been hard to bring this tale to the big screen. Nonetheless, it is a very enjoyable and deeply touching film about the broken relationships some of us have with our parents, and I'm sure there are parts here that all of us can relate to. I know that the relationship I had with my own father wasn't always the best, but ultimately, I know he cared. The film is rated R. NOAH JUPE plays Otis in "Honey Boy," a film based loosely on the life of Shia LaBeouf now playing on Amazon Prime. Film Unfiltered TOM BURKE answers Are you a Church, Scout group, spos team or School hosting a Pancake Breakfast, Cra Fair, Pasta Dinner or any other type of fund-raiser this season? You can buy an ad of this size for only $50! The ad will be in more than 18,000 papers. Deadline: Fridays at 3 p.m. Call 401-334-9555. Dial 0 for details. Prepayment is required. Adveā€¢ise your Volunteer Organization's Fund-raiser on Calendar Pages

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